Absurdities of Modern American Life
in my feet just thinking about it! Maybe they feel more powerful or
skilled or something when they have mastered the act of stilt-walking
those awful things whilst wearing a tight fitting skirt which ends at the ankle!
How the dickens could they actually walk? Isn’t that how they chain up a
they are afraid he will run? And the really strange revelation is that you
see those outfits on sales ladies required to bend over or stretch upward
to get to the items they are selling you! Maybe that’s like boot camp
– basic training for the frustrations of marriage and the restricted
contortions required to raise kids!
inseam measurement is located about knee level! That’s absolutely absurd!
course, the compensating adjustment is that the pants are roomy enough
inside to house two or more people and an AK-47 without detection! It
always amazes me that these are the clothes the gang members choose to
wear when they plan something that will require running from the scene of
the crime! Isn’t there something wrong with that logic?
have to wear your non-conformist uniform, I suppose. Oh, I know you are saying
we had non-conformist uniforms as kids too… yes, but remember, ours were different,
therefore they must have been better, right? And more reasonable! Well,
of course! Come on now!
of them at the counter level so you could not reach both of them to
disable them simultaneously, and you’d usually end up with two views,
like mug shots? And perhaps you can provide cameras that allow enough
detail for identification beyond, “I think there is a moving object of
some sort, in the image where the gunman was probably standing.” It
seems to me that if I spend the money to get one of these systems, I’d
like it to help nab the bad guy!
It has also occurred to me that there ought to be a clearly labeled iron
bar across the front of the counter at 7-11 or Circle K. It ought to be spring
loaded with such a powerful mechanism that when the clerk stepped on the pedal,
knock the wind out of any clown standing there threatening her… maybe
take a few ribs out in the process, as well as auto-dialing 911. I know
there are numerous dangers and legal complications to that kind of
approach, (Ain’t lawyers fun?) but maybe the kid that works there at
in the morning will make it
home in the daylight. Big signs and bright orange paint and window markings and
caution warnings! If the robbery slug knows it’s there, he may be less likely
to pull a knife or a Saturday night special. (Who cares what the ACLU has
to say?) I think the signs and a couple of good news stories on the
just might do it. –fhs